The NonCanon Truth
by PallaPlease
Summary: I now poke fun at my X-Men: Ev fanfics.  ^-  [Complete]


The Non-Canon Truth  
  
  
AN: I decided to poke fun at my own fanfiction in X-Men Evolution. *grins* Basically, I was wondering how the X-Men and the Brotherhood would react to my fanfiction (despite the fact that I have only one Brotherhood fanfic). There's no other way to explain this.  
  
Dedicated to those who've supported me, ridiculed me, and to those who politely pointed out what they personally didn't like about my fanfics. I pay attention to each and every one of ya. You rule. (Yes, you do. Don't contradict me. ;} )  
  
On a side note, I ditched that comedy-romance fic idea. Too complex. 0o.  
  
This is rated PG for mild language and some other stuff. Yeah. *giggles madly*  
  
**  
  
Evan was planning on hogging the computer all day like an obsessed teenager when it happened.  
  
A bloodcurdling scream erupted from the computer room and he threw the door open to see Kitty screaming nonstop, her eyes twitching madly and her body tembling.  
  
Intelligently, he said the first thing that came to mind.  
  
"What the hell?"   
  
"It-it's-it…it's a-a-a-a-a…"  
  
"It's a what?" he prompted, moving over to her and trying to soothe her. Impatiently, she batted his arms away.   
  
"A fanfic!"  
  
The room fell completely silent and Evan's face paled.  
  
"F-f-fanfic?" he finally managed to squeak out and Kitty nodded, looking as if she was on the verge of tears.  
  
"And the writer paired *me* with…with…with…KURT!!!!"  
  
With this said, she broke into uncontrolled sobs, flinging her arms on the keyboard and crying her heart out. "She's insane!" she sobbed, "This PallaPlease person! She wrote… 'Kurtty' WAFF! How could she?!"  
  
Evan looked at the shaking girl and then at the computer, temptation being too strong.  
  
Unable to resist, he began reading.  
  
When he was done, his eyes were enormous. "Since when has Kurt tried writing a letter?" he wondered aloud.   
  
Kitty hit him on the side of his head. "It's a *fanfic*, moron!"  
  
He winced and rubbed his head tenderly, scowling and making a face. "Yeah, well, FINE, shoot me down already," grumbled Evan.  
  
"What's going on in here?"  
  
Both teens looked up to see Scott, Rogue, Jean, and Kurt standing there and Kitty moaned softly, dropping her head back on the keyboard and cursing cruel fate.   
  
"Fanfiction," Evan said promptly and there was a mass reaction consisting of the inhaling of air and a collective shuddering that rippled through the room.   
  
Quickly, Kitty clicked the 'back' button and hastily clicked on a different story, one with a title of "Just Homework."  
  
As if lured by the horror and perversity of fanfiction, the group of six teens gathered around the console reading it along with Kitty.  
  
Jean fainted.  
  
Scott slugged Evan.  
  
Basic mayhem broke out.  
  
In a corner, a shadow was taking notes quickly…  
  
After Rogue managed to pry Scott off of poor Evan and Kurt somehow revived Jean, Kitty clicked 'back' again, closing her eyes and randomly clicking another story.  
  
" 'Truly, Madly, Deeply,' " she read and everyone shrugged.  
  
Approximately four minutes and thirty-five seconds later, Jean looked fit to kill Rogue, who was blushing furiously. Scott looked completely bemused. (Evan and Kurt were making gagging motions while Kitty smacked herself in the face.)  
  
"Just be thankful she doesn't have that 'Angel' story someone talked about," Kitty muttered. 'I can't believe this nut would write Kurt with *me*!!'  
  
And now to the Brotherhood.  
  
"YOU FLIPPED ME *OFF*?!!?!" Lance roared and there was a stunned silence.  
  
"Um…Lance….it's only a fanfic," Pietro explained when he managed to blink again. Magneto stuck a finger in his ear and twisted it, attempting to regain his hearing whilst Mystique struggled to get off the floor without basic leg movement (since her dress was skin tight and she wore high heeled boots religiously).   
  
Todd nodded fervently, praying frantically.  
  
"Of course," the silver haired speedster continued nonchalantly, "he does flip you off to your back occasionally."  
  
(The following has been censored so as to keep this at a PG level.)  
  
(Now back to the X-Men.)  
  
"An-an-and, Auntie O, it was HORRIBLE!!!" Ororo comforted Evan, who was trembling and crying.  
  
Logan watched, slightly horrified.  
  
"How could anyone be so cruel as to write fanfiction about these children?" Professor Xavier marveled aloud.  
  
Logan shrugged. "Ya never can tell with nuts like that…what's-her-name."  
  
"PallaPlease!" Kurt chirped, happy about her obvious Kurt/Kitty streak.  
  
Evan broke into more sobs.   
  
"Hey, ya'll gotta check this out," Rogue suddenly called out. "Ya won't buh-LIEVE what she did to those Digimon people."  
  
In the shadows, a silhouette cackled madly and vanished.  
  
Mass blinking ensued.  
  
"Do I, like, want to know?" Kitty finally asked slowly and there was a loud, "NO!!" from all directions.   
  
~OWARI~  
  
Yeah, it stinks. I'm so proud! *lol* Actually, I love Digimon more than X-Men: Evo and I'm a proud Daikari & Miyakeru & Kenmi & Sorato & Jyun supporter! That's, in order, Daisuke/Davis X Hikari/Kari & Miyako/Yolei X Takeru/TK & Ken X Mimi & Sora X Yamato & Jyou X Jun! Yeah! Okay, TTFN! Ta-ta for now! (Tigger rules!) 


End file.
